Last week,
my husband and I took a road trip about 4 hours north of our home to attend the
funeral of his cousin. The trip to the funeral was one of me falling in
and out of sleep while he drove, so there was little conversation. On the
way home, I asked the question to him, "What do you think people will say
about me at my funeral?" He laughed and said, "Sherri, there
are so many good things people will say, but here is what I would say about
you"........... He said, "You are loyal". I asked,
"What do you mean, to you?" He said, "You are loyal to
your kids, loyal to your callings, loyal to your job, loyal to your God, but
most of all, you are loyal to me. I never have to worry about you being
unfaithful and it's such a great feeling to know you love me enough to never
let that happen."
His words brought tears to my
eyes because he was right. I'm not sure though that I have ever really
stopped to think about the fact that I am loyal, but I do know that to my
husband and I both, it is something that is extremely important since we were
both cheated on in our first marriages. We know firsthand the worry, the
pain of that constant pit in our stomachs, the helplessness and the blame
and guilt that comes with that emotional trauma.
My ex-husband was addicted to
pornography. I didn't know until after our temple marriage that his
addiction began as a young boy. Had I known, I would have ran as fast as
I could away from what became and 18 year battle. His addiction
eventually led to two affairs resulting in our divorce. When I read
"The State of the Nation Report: Appendix 5 Pornography,
sexual infidelity and family breakdown, pg. 144", I felt I was reading
exactly what happened to my marriage and family.
In Doctrine and Covenants 42:22 we read: "“Thou shalt
love thy wife with all thy heart, and shalt cleave unto her and none else”
President
Spencer W. Kimball said, "The words "none
else" eliminate everyone
and everything. The spouse then becomes preeminent in the life of the husband
or wife, and neither social life nor occupational life nor political life nor
any other interest nor person nor thing shall ever take precedence over the
companion spouse."
It is my testimony that marriage
between a man and a woman truly is ordained of God and that Satan is doing all
he can and working overtime, to fill our minds with doubt, frustration, anger and
pride that we might turn away from our spouse and towards him. We need to
arm ourselves with the love, devotion and sacrifice it takes to cleave only
unto our spouse, to be loyal.
-"Fidelity in a Marriage: It's More Than You
Think", Kenneth W. Matheson, Professor, School of Social Work,
Brigham Young University, September, 2009.
-
No comments:
Post a Comment