February 4, 2017....."Happy Marriage: Cold, Hard Facts to Consider"

     This week in my marriage course, we learned about different trends that are affecting the family, such as divorce, cohabitation, births to unmarried women, fertility rates and more.  For this post, I will focus on divorce since it has affected my family and I lived through it.

     My ex-husband and I met when we were in college, he was baptized and two years later we were married in the Mesa, AZ temple.  So by the time we were married, we had known each other 4 years. My decision to marry him was one of knowledge and inspiration and to this day I do not regret my decision.  After about 5 years and 1 child later, my marriage fell apart.  I wont go into detail but my worst fears came true.  I sought the counsel of my bishop who was a wise and caring man.  The church does not advise divorce so he helped me think and pray my way to my decision.

     I didn't realize at the time the church's view on divorce, but this week as we listened to Elder James E. Faust, he said, "Some marriages just fail".  He also that there can be "Just Cause" for divorce, such as; breaking of covenants and the destruction of one's dignity.  Reasons like personality differences and falling out of love are not just causes. 

     Dallin H. Oaks talk on "Divorce" was very informative on the church's view.  He said, "Bishops do not council members to divorce, but they can help members with the consequences of their decisions.  Under the law of the Lord, a marriage, like a human life, is a precious, living thing.  If our bodies are sick, we seek healing again and again.  The same should be true of our marriages, and if we seek Him, the Lord will help us and heal us."

     I believe the Lord wants us to be happy and along with their counsel on divorce, our church leaders also want us to be happy. 

Elder Dallin H. Oaks, "Divorce"